Ramblings of a Mad Man

7 05 2013

Isn’t it funny had we can change so dramatically as people without really realising it?

This time last year, I enjoyed writing for my blog whenever I got the chance. But this year, that enjoyment has seemed to disappear. And I fear that this has come across in the quality of my writing.

For some reason, I was looking at the stats for this blog yesterday. As I’ve tweeted at least once that I know of, I’m still amazed that the one post that got me called to the bosses office for all the wrong reasons is still my most successful blog by more than double the number of views of that in second. And the second most viewed post is one where I show my disgust at something (maybe I should complain more often).

But looking back at some posts from last year, I’m just amazed at how much my writing style has changed. Some might say that it has changed for the better, but personally I’m not sure if that’s true.

As a kid, I always wanted to be a comedian because I liked making people happy. Unfortunately this never transpired as I’m not funny. In high school I was what you might call ‘witty’ as I was quick at making a joke out of something. However, they were what are sometimes referred to as ‘dad jokes’. In other words they were lame and people only smiled because it was so simple it was stupid.

I was also the possibly the biggest optimist. I remember one time after a game of basketball when my team were annihilated that someone asked me why I always smiled. Even after my team just got flogged like it had. “Because it could be worst”, was my stock answer. And it’s true.

In the last month there have been the Boston bombings and the fertilizer plant explosion in Texas (and they’re just the ones that I can remember). My life looks pretty rosy compared to the lives of those affected, doesn’t it?

But something has changed. My writing style last year was just so, accessible?  I think that’s the best way to describe it. I was able to write about anything you asked me to. I could form an opinion on the spot and just go from there; but now not so much. I don’t seem to crack as many jokes or quips than I used to, and I honestly can’t figure out why.

So, to sound vein for just a minute, I’m kind of jealous of myself from 12 months ago.

When I was tasked with making a speech in front of class, I could do it easy. Sure there was the inevitable case of the nerves, but I remember when I burst into song and had everyone sing along. I don’t think I could manage that this year. In fact, I get nervous just thinking about going to class let alone physically going. Have you seen the new ad from Beyond Blue? That’s how I feel a lot of the time.

So my posts for this blog have been fewer than 12 months ago, and they’re not even as funny.

But it’s not just my writing that has changed. Socially, I’m nothing like the person I was last year. How do I know this? I can’t remember the last time I went to the beach for a swim. I know this may sound weird, but I used to look forward to the summer when I could hit the sand running and crash into the water. Now I wouldn’t care if I never hit the water again. I‘ve become a right landlubber.

Ever since the end of 2010, everything is different. I now sleep more than ever. And I eat a lot more crap. So much so that I have pledged to myself that I will cut out the chocolate and the fizzy drinks and anything else out of my diet (the chocolate end of the deal held up for a solid three months; then Easter came around and I haven’t jumped of the bandwagon since).

That’s why I want to submit yesterday’s post for my feature for uni but fear I won’t be allowed. And if I’m not allowed then I’m screwed because I really can’t think of anything else I want to/could write about for 1300 words.

See what I meant by people change in such short periods of time? I can’t even remember what the point of this post is. So if you can extract a meaning for me, that would be wonderful.

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